A Conversation With Ernesto Chavezvaldivia by Suzanne Scheideker Cook and Diana Reyes Williams
“Courage defines all other human behavior.” - David Letterman
Diana: Why don’t we start by having you tell us a little about yourself.
Well, I was born and raised in Southern California. Both of my parents emigrated from Peru, along with my grandma who raised my sister and me while my parents worked. My grandma only spoke Spanish, so that became my first language. I learned to read, write, and speak Spanish due to my grandma’s insistence on having us read biographies aloud in Spanish before writing down everything we had just read.
I eventually learned English when I started elementary school by listening to the other kids on the playground as well as my classroom teachers. Looking back, I learned a life lesson at that age that has stayed with me to this day which is the ability to listen. By listening intently, I’ve been able to pick up on what somebody's feeling or what they're really trying to say based on micro-expressions and inflections in their voice.
Something else I learned while I was growing up was to be open to meeting people from different backgrounds. My mom loved meeting people, so we were fortunate to have Catholic, Christian, Buddhist, and Muslim friends. Meeting all these people with different backgrounds and beliefs taught me to be respectful and aware of others as well as to be curious about the world. The reality is we’re all quite different yet so remarkably similar.
Diana: At what age did you feel comfortable speaking English?
Around 6th grade. There were moments I’d want to participate in conversations but I’d mispronounce a word or I didn’t feel like it was coming out properly. I may have been saying it correctly but it sounded awkward. Anyway, around 6th grade was when I began feeling comfortable enough to have full conversations in English.
Suzanne: Were you born and raised in Riverside?
Yep, born and raised in Riverside. I attended K-12 here and eventually graduated from California Baptist University. I liked the idea of staying home and being around family, plus I had an opportunity to try to walk-on the basketball team, which ultimately didn’t work out.
Suzanne: So, you’re a fan of basketball?
Yes, I am. I’m a huge Lakers fan and love to play it too. Unfortunately I can’t really do that right now because you know, I don’t want to risk it.
Suzanne: Could you tell us more about how you met us and how we started collaborating on the blog?
Yes, so I met you Suzanne, through the marketing agency I work for. I worked on developing your website and you eventually reached out because you were thinking of starting a blog to complement your book, A Mentor at Your Fingertips. I wanted to make sure that we built it out the right way and that it delivered the central message of your book, which is real perspectives on mentorship. So, now we’ve launched the blog and our relationship has continued to grow along with it.
Suzanne: And what do you plan on sharing through your contributions to this blog?
A perspective from somebody who's still figuring it out. It's been nice getting to know both of you and you both have had great careers. You have all of these experiences that I enjoy listening to and learning from. I think my addition to the blog is how I’m learning presently because I’m making important decisions in real time. It might be a living journal where I can share with others my good and bad choices, and being a mentor based on my experiences.
Suzanne: I don’t mean to put you on the spot, but you don’t think we’re still trying to figure it out too? [Laughing]
Now normally I’d focus on you and ask you to explain some more but I can't do that because this interview is about me. [Laughing] That’s my safe space, turning the attention away from me. It’s true, we should never stop growing. We’re ever-evolving as individuals and to claim that you have it all figured out is very naive.
Suzanne: Do you have a lifetime quote that you think frames your life or a quote for the moment?
I love reading commencement speeches, and I actually just read one by Bill Watterson, the cartoonist who created Calvin and Hobbes, that really struck me. It’s from “Some Thoughts on the Real World by One Who Glimpsed It and Fled,” and the line is, “Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement.” Whatever my next step is, it must be something that reflects my values and my soul. Otherwise, I’m just running in place.
Suzanne: What started you looking at commencement speeches?
When I admire or am interested in someone I go down what feels like a rabbit hole. I’ll watch every interview and read everything they’ve written. This has led me to discovering a few commencement speeches. The first one that really grabbed me was Steve Jobs’ speech at Stanford. It’s beautifully written, and I later found out that Aaron Sorkin, one of my favorite screenwriters, had a hand in polishing it up. Another great one is by David Foster Wallace called “This is Water.” Eventually, I plan on typing these speeches up on an old typewriter and framing them. There’s something about writing or typing something out that makes it stick in my memory.
Diana: If you could go back to your 9th grade self, what would you tell yourself today. Remember you’re 14 years old and on the verge of going to high school as a freshman.
I would probably say “Don't overthink it.” There's a lot of pressure on some kids to make sure you do whatever it is you’re supposed to do in life but I think I would tell myself to live in the moment and enjoy your childhood. Have you seen Soul? The main character has this idea of what he’s supposed to do in life which is to be a jazz musician. Along the way, he’s forgotten how to live. He forgot to enjoy the walk to the audition. He’d spent so much time focusing on what he was “supposed to do” instead of enjoying the journey. If I could say something else to my 9th grade self, I’d say, “Start enjoying the journey now.”
Diana: It sounds like the Alchemist. Have you read that book?
Yes! I think the end lesson is nobody has the right answer, nobody has the perfect pathway. Like in The Alchemist, he was trying to find buried treasure. The real treasure however was the journey - the road he took to get there. It wasn’t about finding actual gold.
Diana: What are your goals for 2021?
Okay, I’ve been saying this for a while now but I think this year, I really am going to double down on trying to create a life that reflects my values and satisfies my soul. If I’m being completely honest with you, I feel that I’ve been living passively, and I'm just not willing to do that anymore. Next thing you know, ten years goes by and you’re a prisoner of your circumstances. There’s more to life than that in my opinion. I plan on figuring out how I can have the freedom to go after what I enjoy in life while sustaining myself with it. There’s this quote by Conan O’Brien where he says, “If you work really hard and you’re kind to people, amazing things will happen.” I think about that a lot. In anything you do, be a kind person, work really hard, and I’m confident amazing things will happen.
Suzanne: I believe that if it’s your passion, while there will be some twists and turns, you will have success in it. Because if it is your passion, you will be willing to spend extra time on it, not give up easily, think outside the box, and be willing to make the sacrifices you need to make it happen.
Diana: When it’s your passion, you trust the journey.
I’m interested in other people, in their food, and their cultures. To me, not leaving the town where I’m from is not taking advantage of what this world has to offer. There is a lot of beauty in the world and joy to be found everywhere. I want to seek that out.
In a way, the pandemic opened my eyes because we’ve all had to adapt. I still love telling stories and I know there are opportunities out there. Maybe someone identifies with me because they’re around my age and thinking of taking that scary step of following their hearts. I don’t have it all figured out but I’m using what I’m learning from my mentors and from other people that I admire. If I can inspire somebody to go out there and live life, I’ll have done something good.
Ernesto Chavezvaldivia is a creative professional and contributing writer for A Mentor At Your Fingertips. @ernestoche0
