Be Brave by Suzanne Scheideker Cook
“Take chances, make mistakes. That’s how you grow. Your pain nourishes courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave.” – Mary Tyler Moore
Recently, I was having a conversation with a young, male colleague. Our discussion evolved into a discussion on women’s rights when he shared how much things were changing for women. I was surprised. I told him that I respectfully disagreed with his perspective. In fact, I had been in a room attended by 35 individuals who were the decision-makers for their companies. I’d been the only woman in the room. My colleague was quiet and then asked, “What does that feel like? Is it because men still prevent women from being equal in the workplace?” I laughed and replied that the causes of women’s inequality were complex, and I had gotten used to often being the only woman in the room. After we finished our conversation, I reflected more on his question. While the causes of women’s inequality are indeed complicated on many different levels, I realized that I had learned invaluable lessons along the way that I would like to share with you today.
Be brave enough to go through a door when it opens instead of staying in your comfort zone. We are creatures of habit because it’ss comfortable. Believe in yourself and explore new opportunities and paths.
Become a subject matter expert and the “go-to person” in your organization. Details matter.
Accept and adapt to the situation.
Follow your passion and define your own success. Have the courage to be who you truly are.
Ignore naysayers. There is a difference between someone playing “Devil’s Advocate” and a toxic, negative person. Playing “Devil’s Advocate” can be invaluable because the person is expressing a completely different viewpoint to provoke discussion and test the strengths of your arguments. On the other hand, naysayers are critical and pessimistic no matter how well things are going.
Keep your sense of humor.
Treat others with respect and dignity including those who have difficult personalities (and make you grind your teeth.)
Accept responsibility and be accountable for your actions. For example, if your peers are coming to work 15 minutes late and the boss is not saying anything, do not follow their example. Remember to always put your best foot forward without being a “goody two-shoes”.
I thought of another conversation with a woman who was fascinated that I worked with construction and transportation companies. She asked me how I got into my field. I answered, “I went through the doors that were open and didn’t look back at the doors that had closed.”
Your personal challenge is adapted from one of my favorite quotes by Norman Vincent Peale who said, “Never talk defeat. Use words like hope, belief, faith, victory.” Using this quote, monitor your conversations with others as well as your internal thoughts. Keep track of how many times you talk defeat rather than victory. Do you need to make changes?
